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The sermon for May. 11, 2003 is: to the mother of all mothers
5:05 a.m. this is a shout-out today to Mitochondrial Eve, whom I never write, and Y-chromosome Adam. Thank you, you pair of big old homo misericordaprogenites monkeyling freaks of nature you, for coming up with the human genome! Thank you for coming up with human reproduction, and for spawning six billion squawling squirming overreaching mewling failing descendants, all transporting your mitochondria and Y-stametes safe-as-houses! And if I didn't thank you for directly linking lighthearted fucking to lightheaded childbearing -- thank you for that! (Did you know that sex equals death?) Speaking for myself and, I'm sure, all of humanity, please accept this bouquet of bananas cunningly peeled and shaped to resemble flowers and this one-pound box of chocolates as a token of our gratitude. Here's lookin' at you, Ma!
 
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