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The sermon for Apr. 25, 2003 is: aporia


3:12 p.m. I went to Todd's funeral last week. It was sad, of course. They played all these odd songs -- "Rocky Mountain High"? And the most spine-cringing moment was when this amateur soprano from behind a screen sang "Wind Beneath My Wings," or whatever that Whitney Houston song was. I could just hear Todd ripping the cigarette out from his mouth and snorting, Thank god I'm already dead, honey, because this would just kill me.

But it was so sad. And he was so young.

It makes me afraid to die. I hate being afraid, especially of dying. I think the apprehension of the fear of death is the first sign that you have gotten old. The second sign, I think, would be actually dying. The third sign, I hope, would be a "U-TURN OK" one.

There's this incredibly pretty girl right in front of me talking on her cell phone. Everytime I look at her, she's looking at me. And then I look away. I'm afraid to look at her directly. Tie that in with my newfound fear of death.

Todd.

flip flop





Sept. 25, 2004
the Funny Show
Sept. 23, 2004
agriculture poem
Sept. 23, 2004
my life in the ghost of Bush
Sept. 18, 2004
time-lapsed (part 1)
Sept. 16, 2004
unreconciled
Goodbye present, hello past









Images are taken without permission from the fine and trusting folks at Folk Arts of Poland; please purchase something from them. Background music stolen without permission from Epitonic, Basta Music, and just about everywhere else my unscrupulous hands could grab something. No rights reserved.